Welcome to my blog. This is my way of dealing with the chronic health issues along with depression anxiety and PTSD.
Finding Family
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Losing our mother was to me, the last link to my Grandparents on my mother's side. Fortunately I was able to locate my extended family and it was like all of them who had gone on before us was giving back to us.
Last night we almost lost each other all based on a failure to communicate with one another. He is the other half of my beating heart, and yet; I felt farther away from him than I have ever felt. He was hurting, I was hurting and those loving feelings were beginning to wane from one another. I wanted those longing looks we would give each other, you know, that knowing, the desire, the unspoken language of love and mutual respect that we had for one another. He is my best friend and I wanted desperately to be his again, but when one has shut down emotionally, the other is faced with the dilemma should I stay or should I go and the fact that my blind eye was making him feel unwanted when all I ever wanted was him and our life together, but I had to almost lose him for me to see just how important he is to me and for that I will never take my husband for granted. I will be very vocal about the way I love him, not only through my words, but my actions, I will always communicate and defer t...
There’s a limit to my patience. My husband is making me resentful towards him. I’m trying very hard to be patient but this financial situation he has put me in is really making me want to walk away.
I never really know from one day to the next if I have ever felt loved and appreciated by my husband. He can be so shortsighted sometimes and it frustrates me and infuriates me at the same time. There are times when I feel like he is just biding his time until he gets his car paid off so he can really show his natural black behind to me. I have done more than a woman in a loveless marriage would do and still I stay but make no mistake about it I won’t continue to play the fool. There’s no passion no real connection between us. The mechanics of sex is there but is that real love absolutely not.
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